Do You Have the Willpower to Deal With Difficult People?
Posted On Monday, July 6, 2009 at на 4:58 AM by adminI bet you will agree that there are people around you who make life miserable for you. They may even dominate or control you. As you rub elbows daily with such folks at home, workplace and in the streets, you are constantly deciding on how to act properly towards them. These minute decisions are being made by almost everyone. We don't want to mess up with difficult people and so we are always wary of our actions.
Troublesome people lurk everywhere. They are not really criminals, but they give others 'a pain in the neck.' They are the ones whom we might call the difficult people. And most of us deal with them everyday - without knowing who they are, why they are so, and how to deal with them. Answers to these questions equip us in dealing with them, and even in helping them. Sometimes they?re just your parents, spouse, children, bosses, business partners, business associates, or your close friends.
You will run away all your life. No place on earth is safe from difficult people. You really have no choice but to learn how to face them squarely and effectively. Conflicts throughout history, whether small or large scale, local or global, were attributed to difficult people who went out of bounds and affected the rest of humanity. Hence, the atomic bomb in Hiroshima, the genocide in Europe in World War II, the Holocaust, and even the Fall in the Garden of Eden took place.
If you know how to master your communication skills especially deal with difficult and yet important people to you in business or workplace, people will start to like you. If we all become true to these desires, we can make a lot of people happy, difficult or otherwise. We can start to spread the spirit of happiness around us and help make this world a better place, even in a limited sense. If people like you, you're communicating your way to riches!
Here are some practical steps to develop the willpower to deal with difficult people.
1. You must like people. All people take all sorts of attitudes. Liking people is the first sure step to triumph. Avoiding them, especially the difficult ones, is a sure road to becoming difficult yourself. So the first natural thing to do is go out and meet people. Very soon, you will meet difficult people. Greet them and genially accept whatever reaction they give you. Don?t be discouraged but greet more of them regularly until you get used to them, and until your LOT skyrockets to record-breaking heights. They may be rude and cruel, but no one?s ever heard of getting shot or killed by greeting difficult people.
2. Smile. Most touchy people can be neutralized by a friendly smile. So practice putting on a pleasant, simple, friendly smile in front of a mirror. Public speakers and actors study their facial expressions facing a mirror. Political and beauty aspirants take time with a photographer just putting on the best smile that exudes confidence and friendliness. A smile, they say, says it all. Regardless of how your face looks, a smile always puts on warmth and comeliness. A good smile always arrests the temper, even that of difficult people. So always smile.
3. Be sincere. A smile helps a lot, but sincerity gives your smile credibility. A mere smile is a matter of facial muscle flexing. When this alone is involved, the smile becomes unnatural. Put your heart into it! A sincere heart will automatically show if you live a life of sincerity. Practice sincerity. Always be sincere in all you do daily. When your heart gets used to being sincere, smiling sincerely becomes natural. Difficult people can see right through you, and sincerity melts their hearts.
4. Listen well. Almost every difficult people want to talk much more than they listen. This is the main problem in communication. Difficult people love to talk and want people to listen to them. In a nutshell that's what they are. Basically, you cannot put two difficult persons together and have them talk. Difficult people avoid each other once they recognize each other. If they are made to sit down and listen, they won't stand it. They will either stand up and steal the scene, or just walk out. If you are working for or with a difficult person, practice becoming a good listener, or worse locked up with him for life.
You must learn the wisdom of enjoying listening. Few have this wisdom. Most people think there is wisdom in monopolizing a conversation. As in business, this only results in unfairness and silent protests. You can make difficult people happy when you just listen to them. Not many can do this. When you are a good listener, even the most difficult people tend to trust you with their secrets. Then you begin to know them as they reveal who they really are. You begin to understand them deeper; thus, you will be able to help them better. As they open up their secrets, understand and love them more.
5. Be agreeable. This does not necessarily mean agreeing to anything difficult people say, but it is more about agreeing not to argue. If you don?t agree with the opinions of difficult people, just listen and send everything to your mental bin. Delete. It's your right. But never argue. Never mind if they say you are not confrontational. So what? Nobody dies because of that. But arguments often kill. Nations go to war because of arguments. See the wisdom? Remember that every seed of kindness you plant now will surely reap a harvest of favors soon. It happens each time.
Valuables are often left to agreeable people, never to aggressive ones. Very few trust contrary people. If you are known for your politeness, even the most difficult folks will give you special favors. Always remember that the most difficult people are strivers. They are workaholics. They feed on pressure to hit their goals. Oftentimes they get promoted to positions that confer favors on 'worthy' men. They often rake in more valuables than the average guy.
6. Praise. Even though you think differently and have a different idea for success, take note of their worth and achievements. Appreciate their efforts, share their triumphs and sad moments. At times, a smile or tap of congratulations or sympathy is enough and speaks volumes. But never overdo it.
Autor: Julius P
Julius P is a Business Consultant with an MBA Degree from UK in Marketing. He enjoy meeting people and believes in living the positive side of life. But more than that, he is passionate about setting goals and achieving them. He is action-oriented with a strong work ethic. He enjoys reading, writing, socializing, meeting people, and traveling. He is also fond of Bollywood & Hollywood movies. He loves studying human behaviour pattern and his book, "Communicate to Success" is been launched at http://www.wealthycommunication.com
Added: July 6, 2009
Source: http://ezinearticles.com/